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They say, “Dig the well before you are thirsty.” Or as JFK put it, “The best time to repair the roof is when the sun is shining.” Benjamin Franklin reminded us that “an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure” and warned that “by failing to prepare, you are preparing to fail.” The message is clear: The smartest time to prepare for marriage is before you’re in it. And once you are in it, the same rule applies—you prepare today for the marriage you want tomorrow.

If you’ve been shidduch dating for what feels like forever, you know that sometimes the only way to stay sane is to find the humor in it all. When you’ve been through enough dates to write a dissertation on hotel lobby dynamics, and you’re still showing up with hope and a smile, you deserve some recognition. The dating process can be exhausting, overwhelming, and downright bizarre at times. But if you don’t laugh about it, you might just lose your

Time moves differently when you’re waiting. Scientists have proven that uncertainty makes minutes feel like hours, days feel like months. Your brain literally can’t process time normally when it doesn’t know when something will end. Every parent knows this secret: when you tell a child “five more minutes,” they can handle it. But say “we’ll leave soon,” and they fall apart. Humans crave endpoints. We can endure almost anything if we know when it stops. I’ve always wondered why the period between

Usually, this space is all about me sharing my thoughts, and I have plenty of those. But this week, I wanted to hear from you. What is on your mind? In your heart? I posted this on my status (I am sharing it for those who didn’t see it): I’m changing things up in my newsletter this week! Instead of MY thoughts taking up space in your inbox, I want to hear yours. What’s your story lately? What are you dealing with, feeling

We don’t get to choose what survives. For three weeks, flames consumed everything. The Bais Hamikdash—that magnificent building of carved cedar and gleaming gold, where Hashem’s presence dwelled among marble pillars and intricate tapestries—was reduced to ash and rubble. The Romans methodically destroyed every sacred vessel, every precious element, every carefully crafted detail that had taken years to build. They tore down the towering walls, scattered the stones, and left behind only devastation where once stood the most beautiful structure

Don’t think about a pink elephant. What did you just think about? Exactly. Your brain just proved something fascinating: when someone tells you NOT to think about something, that’s precisely what your mind focuses on. The word “don’t” gets lost in translation, but “pink elephant” sticks like glue. The Psychology Behind the Problem This isn’t just a cute party trick – it’s how our brains are wired. When we hear negative commands like “don’t panic” or “no stress,” our minds latch onto the main action word (panic, stress) and essentially

Picture this: You’re on a third date with a guy, and they’re telling you about their five-year plan, their hashkafa, and their thoughts on where to live after marriage. Check, check, check—everything sounds great on paper. So why does something feel… off? Maybe because you’ve been setting marriage goals like you’re hiring a business partner instead of choosing a life partner. When I start working with new clients, I always ask the same question: “Why do you want to get

Last week, one of my clients came to me all frustrated. “I went out with three guys recently, but all of them said no after the third date,” she said. “I don’t get it. What am I doing wrong?” So we did some detective work. Turns out, she was basically turning into a one-woman consulting firm every time her dates mentioned something challenging- work stress, family drama, whatever, she’d immediately launch into problem-solving mode. “Have you tried this?” “You should

Decoding dating language can launch a full-blown overthinking spiral. Ever read a text from a date and thought, “Wait… what does that really mean?” You get a “Sounds good,” and suddenly you’re wondering if they’re excited… or just being polite. They say, “We’ll talk soon,” and you’re left unsure — is that tomorrow, next week, or never? One Word, Many Meanings If you’ve been following me or reading my blogs, you already know how much I love words. I collect

Last week, I talked about the word AND — how it’s possible to feel two things at once. You can be content with parts of your life AND still ache for the one thing that hasn’t fallen into place yet. You can feel confident AND unsure. Hopeful and honestly just… tired. This week, I want to introduce another three-letter word that may be even more powerful when it comes to dating: YET. Caution: If you are past the dating stage, don’t stop reading! While this was written

There’s a principle I’ve been thinking about a lot lately — one that applies to almost every part of life: career, friendships, marriage, dating, and mental health. But for this post, I’ll play the role of dating coach — as the midnight date debriefers seem to think I am — and focus on how this plays out in the world of dating. Dating is full of mixed messages. One minute it’s: “You’re enough. Just be yourself.” And the next it’s:

Last week, we started exploring some ideas from my book Finding Forever, and talked about the first step in dating: getting clear on why you want to get married and build a life with someone else. This week, I want to take it a step deeper. Because once you know why you want to build something, the next question becomes: Who’s actually doing the building? And by that, I don’t mean the person you’re dating. I mean you. Is the life you’re living

Before we talk about how to date, let’s talk about why. I was ready to start sharing sneak peeks from my upcoming book, Finding Forever: From First Date to Soulmates – starting with dating tips, such as understanding red flags, communication skills, and how to stop overthinking. But then I paused and asked myself:Before we talk about how to date… do you even know why you want to get married? I say that only half-joking. Because if we’re being real,

There’s this weird, quiet heaviness that creeps in sometime between the first “Where will you be for Pesach?” message and the moment you find yourself watching a stranger on Instagram scrub their fridge in slow motion. You can’t exactly name it—but you feel it. The ache of knowing that, once again, you’ll be showing up to Yom Tov alone. No one really talks about this part — what it’s like to watch everyone else rush around, lists in hand, arms full

You ever find yourself saying something you believe… but only halfway? Like, “Everything happens in the right time.” It’s the kind of thing we tell others—and even ourselves—when life throws a wrench in the plan. When a door closes. When the thing we were hoping for just… doesn’t happen. We say it to be comforting. Reassuring. And somewhere inside, we do believe it. Kind of. Maybe. Sort of. This past Sunday evening, there was supposed to be an event—an evening

A few weeks ago, I almost stopped writing my weekly blogs. Not because I was too busy. Not because I had nothing to say. (I always have what to say—even when I don’t. It’s a talent, really.) And not because no one is reading them. You are reading this, I think. It was more that I just wasn’t feeling it. I felt off. Drained. Stuck. I had the kind of feeling where everything felt a bit heavier than usual, and

It always amazes me how quickly we shift from Purim into Pesach mode. One moment, we’re delivering mishloach manos, caught up in the energy of the day, and the next, we’re making lists, planning menus, and diving into the cleaning that somehow always feels bigger than we remembered. But we all know that Purim isn’t just about the fun and the simcha—it’s a day when the gates of heaven are wide open. A day when tefillah carries a different weight.

If you had to describe last week as a food, what would it be? A warm, comforting bowl of soup? A half-burnt piece of toast because things didn’t go as planned? A five-course meal because everything somehow aligned perfectly? For me, last week felt like a cup of coffee that I forgot about and had to reheat three times before finally giving up and drinking it lukewarm. (This happens daily to me, just FYI, but don’t tell anyone.) Forgetting about