Light at the end of the tunnel

I wanted to share a thought about Shiva Assar B’Tammuz – the 17th of Tammuz. It’s the start of what’s known as “The Three Weeks.” This period commemorates the time between the breaching of the walls of Yerushalayim and the eventual destruction of the Beis Hamikdash. It’s a tough three weeks, marked by sadness and reflection, but there’s also a deeper lesson here about resilience and hope. One of the most challenging aspects of any difficult situation is the uncertainty

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Miriam Zeitlin explains why shidduch humor and authenticity can go far on your resume

From Paper to Person: More Than a One-Page Wonder

Shidduch dating. The magical world where your entire essence is condensed into a one-page shidduch resume. It is easy to feel like you’re being reduced to a neatly formatted Word document and your worth is measured in font size and bullet points. You can’t help but wonder: “Am I a person or just a resume?” If you’ve ever felt more like a list of qualifications than a living, breathing person, and you need some shidduch dating humor, this post is

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Miriam Zeitlin gives Chizuk in Shidduchim

Chizuk in Shidduchim: A Lesson From Elephants & Dogs

Who doesn’t love a good story, especially one that involves adorable animals and a lesson that offers chizuk in Shidduchim? This is the tale of the elephant and the dog, both of whom found themselves expecting simultaneously. It’s a story with a lesson for anyone who is hoping to meet their bashert soon. A Tale of Two Pregnancies Once upon a time, in a land where animals could talk, an elephant and a dog discovered they were expecting at the

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Beyond Yearbook Predictions

On a recent flight to Chicago for a friend’s son’s wedding, I found myself reminiscing about high school days and wondering what journey life has taken my old classmates on. (For those who don’t know – I went to school in Chicago for my last 2 years of high school, even though I am from Brooklyn.) I have only been back once since I graduated and was about to see classmates I haven’t seen in… well, let’s say it’s been

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The First Couple’s Secret to a Great Marriage

The Irony of the First Advice I want to talk about the secret sauce that Adam and Chava, the very first married couple, had for creating such a great marriage, as it holds a timeless lesson for us all. After they were created, it says in the Torah: “Therefore, a man shall leave his father and mother and cling to his wife.” Hold on a second. Adam and Chava didn’t even have parents! Think about the irony. The first couple,

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Learn more about the science of dating with Miriam Zeitlin

The Surprising Science of Dating

Why What We Think We Want Isn’t Always What We Choose We all have a checklist of what we want in an ideal partner. It could be tall, dark, and handsome or perhaps smart, funny, and kind. But what if I told you those checklists often go right out the window when we actually meet someone in real life? It sounds crazy, but the person who ticks every box on paper isn’t necessarily the one who makes your heart skip

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Honey-Do lists can add much overwhelm to a spouse, explains Miriam Zeitlin

The Honey-Do List: Sweet Words, Sour Demands

In every marriage, there are moments when we need to ask our spouse for help. Whether it’s taking out the garbage, fixing a leaky faucet, or helping with the kids, these requests are part of the daily dance of living together. But what happens when these requests turn into a never-ending list of demands? And does adding a sweet word like “honey” or “darling” really make it any better? Enter the infamous “Honey-do” list. Let’s take a look at how

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Untangling the Divorce Crisis

Rifky, like many young women, always envisioned her wedding day as the start of a blissful journey together with her chosson. The anticipation was tangible as she meticulously planned every detail, from her exquisite gown to the intricate floral arrangements. Her face beamed with happiness as she spoke about the life she would share with her future husband, whom she believed was her soulmate. Friends and family shared in her joy, eagerly awaiting the wedding of a seemingly ideal couple.

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Gifted and Proud: Embracing Your Individuality

In the Declaration of Independence, the famous line “all men are created equal” is often quoted. However, it’s important to understand that this statement doesn’t mean we are all identical. In fact, each one of us is born with unique talents, strengths, and a distinct path in life. The beauty lies in our individuality, and it’s crucial to embrace it wholeheartedly. Don’t try to follow someone else’s path or emulate their greatness. As the saying goes, “Be yourself because everyone

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Stop Waiting, Start Living: Finding Joy Today

Are you thinking what I’m thinking? Pesach is in the rearview mirror; what’s next on the agenda? If you are anything like me, you are already daydreaming about the next big thing. I constantly anticipate what is next, always ticking off the hours, days, weeks, and months for the inevitable changes. It is all a never-ending waiting game. Waiting to meet your perfect match, waiting for the wedding, waiting to have kids, waiting for the kids to be in school, waiting

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Will This Night Be Different?

As Pesach approaches, I’ve been mulling over what to share in my weekly blog post, particularly thinking about the singles in our community. Yom Tov can be tough for singles, caught between family gatherings filled with well-meaning but intrusive questions and Seders with friends where they might feel out of place. My aim was to offer a message of hope that acknowledges the unique challenges singles face and to connect their experiences with the broader story of our nation’s miraculous

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Home clean for Peach

Compare and Despair: The Subtle Art of Making Yourself Miserable

The Pesach Race It’s that time of the year again. As Pesach approaches, a festive spirit envelops the community, coupled with an unspoken competition of domestic prowess. You can’t help but notice how your neighbor has cleaned every nook and cranny of their house, organized each closet, and shopped for a spring wardrobe for the whole family while the stores still had what to sell. You know that their kitchen will be turned over with military precision because that is

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Miriam Zeitlin debunks the myth of dating stereotypes

The Mismatched Match: Dating Stereotypes Debunked

In the world of dating, singles often find themselves scrolling through a collection of stereotypes. From the “Nice Guy” to the “Cool Dude,” the “Intellectual” to the “Aidel Maidel,” our romantic lives seem to be scripted by an unseen playwright who loves to categorize. But what if I told you that these stereotypes can be the backdrop for an unpredictable love story? I had some fun and mixed and matched some unlikely pairings and discovered that sometimes the most unexpected

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Miriam Zeitlin explains what we can learn from the Elephant and Chimpanzee

Remember & Forget: Two-Steps to a Happy Marriage

Navigating the jungle of love and marriage can sometimes feel like an expedition. Despite the abundance of Jewish marriage books out there, sometimes its the simplest things that we can learn from. Here is an easy survival guide inspired by our pals in the animal kingdom: the elephant and the chimpanzee. The two step guide to a happy marriage. Now, you might wonder, “What on earth do these creatures have to do with my marriage?” Here is a great lesson

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Miriam Zeitlin examines the shidduch crisis

The Shidduch Crisis, A Deeper Look

Everywhere you turn, there’s talk of the shidduch crisis.  Numerous organizations help singles get married, there are different initiatives to get boys to start dating younger, and shadchanim are offered monetary compensation to get girls on dates. No doubt these practical solutions to the shidduch crisis are all beautiful and important work, but what is the real cost of it all? Miriam Zeitlin, New York-based shidduch dating coach and kallah teacher uncovers: What is the true shidduch crisis, and how

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Timely Talk: Queen Esther’s Secret

On Purim, we celebrate the salvation of the Jewish people from the wicked Hamas’s plot to annihilate them. This was a frightening time for the Jews, and Queen Esther knew it was up to her to try and save her people. There are so many great lessons we can learn from this story about unity and hope, but I want to focus on the lesson that Queen Esther teaches us, that there is a time for silence and a time

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Beyond Chitchat: Seven Levels of Connection

In the world of dating, many singles find it challenging to establish meaningful levels of connection. Despite the wealth of dating advice available, creating a deep and genuine bond with someone can often feel like an elusive goal. In this article I will address this common struggle by breaking down the seven levels of intimacy as outlined by Matthew Kelly. By understanding and applying these levels in a step-by-step manner, singles can navigate the complexities of dating and learn the

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Miriam Zeitlin explains common relationship misunderstandings

Understanding Each Other in Relationships: Lessons from Amelia Bedelia

Ah, Amelia Bedelia, the literal-minded housekeeper who never fails to misunderstand her employers’ instructions in the most comical ways. Remember when she was asked to “dress the chicken,” and she literally put clothes on it? Or when she was told to “draw the drapes,” she took out her sketchpad instead of closing the curtains? These humorous misunderstandings from my favorite childhood character are not just entertaining but also can teach us so many valuable lessons on the importance of communication

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Shalom Bayis – Understanding its Essence

Shalom Bayis is a concept that resonates deeply within the heart of the Jewish people, but its wisdom is universal, touching the core of families and couples across all cultures. The term “Shalom Bayis” literally translates to “peace in the home” and it represents much more than just the absence of conflict. It’s about creating an environment of love, respect, understanding, and tranquility. In the hustle and bustle of everyday life, stress and friction too often find their way into

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