Have you ever watched a child play with a shape-sorter toy? It’s a simple yet fascinating process where they learn to match different shapes with the corresponding holes. This seemingly straightforward activity offers insights into the world of dating and relationships. Let’s explore how trying to fit into a role that doesn’t truly match who we are is akin to forcing a square peg into a round hole in the realm of dating.
In a child’s shape-sorter toy, each shape is designed to fit perfectly into a specific hole. The square goes into the square hole, the circle fits the circular one, and so on. In dating, we encounter a similar scenario. Each person has their unique set of characteristics, beliefs, values, and personality traits – their ‘shape,’ if you will. When we meet someone, we’re essentially seeing if our shapes align with each other’s.
Sometimes, in our eagerness to connect with someone, we might find ourselves trying to alter our ‘shape.’ We say what we think the other person wants to hear, adopt interests that aren’t truly ours, or even change our values or beliefs. This is similar to trying to fit a triangle into a square hole. It might seem to work at first, but eventually, the truth emerges – the fit isn’t right.
The key lesson from the shape-sorter toy is the importance of authenticity. Just as a round peg smoothly fits into a round hole, a genuine connection in dating comes from being true to ourselves. When we present our authentic selves, we attract people who appreciate us for who we truly are. Yes, this might mean that some ‘holes’ aren’t meant for our ‘shape,’ but it also means that when we do find a match, it’s a more fulfilling and genuine connection.
The biggest obstacle in dating is not about finding someone at any cost; it’s about finding the right someone. This means resisting the urge to change ourselves to fit what we think others want. It’s about understanding and embracing our shape, and patiently looking for the hole where we fit perfectly.
Just like a child’s shape-sorter toy, dating is about finding where we fit naturally and effortlessly. It’s about understanding that forcing a connection where it doesn’t exist is as futile as trying to fit the wrong shape into a hole. By embracing our true selves, we open the door to more meaningful, authentic, and lasting connections. So, the next time you find yourself altering your ‘shape’ to fit someone else’s ‘hole,’ remember the simple wisdom of the shape-sorter toy – the right fit is always worth the wait.
